My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Randomize
