Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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