Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize