a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
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He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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