I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
