spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
