my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
