My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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