the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
there is puke in my bra ... again
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