just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize
