Texts From Last Night

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  (310): View more from California

  i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret

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  (310): i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret http://tfl.nu/lkw1
  Replies (3) Good night (698) Bad night (1620)
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.

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  (604): a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point? (604): unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going. http://tfl.nu/jiid
  Replies (15) Good night (926) Bad night (2166)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.

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  (214): they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids. http://tfl.nu/ux66
  Replies (18) Good night (1199) Bad night (2773)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.

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  (214): we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER. http://tfl.nu/9rv5
  Replies (58) Good night (12879) Bad night (1224)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"

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  (631): Strippers tramp stamp says "mom" http://tfl.nu/an62
  Replies (21) Good night (918) Bad night (4547)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke

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  (469): She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke http://tfl.nu/g6cx
  Replies (15) Good night (1013) Bad night (4650)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.

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  (407): She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast. http://tfl.nu/4kxl
  Replies (7) Good night (3133) Bad night (1473)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.

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  (513): Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one. http://tfl.nu/i2d2
  Replies (14) Good night (4788) Bad night (1522)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  Apparently senior citizens don't like that position

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  (505): Apparently senior citizens don't like that position http://tfl.nu/ttsr
  Replies (34) Good night (1208) Bad night (5568)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?

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  (404): What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender? http://tfl.nu/bcp3
  Replies (4) Good night (1356) Bad night (2345)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.

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  (714): And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless. http://tfl.nu/ni8k
  Replies (8) Good night (3188) Bad night (920)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?

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  (216): there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed? http://tfl.nu/x18l
  Replies (2) Good night (1799) Bad night (1652)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?

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  (920): Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job? http://tfl.nu/emh8
  Replies (10) Good night (2788) Bad night (1111)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.

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  (803): We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night. (864): I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this. http://tfl.nu/ixlj
  Replies (5) Good night (1073) Bad night (415)
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.

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  (703): I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat. http://tfl.nu/wce9
  Replies (1) Good night (335) Bad night (464)

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