Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken