Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
