Texts From Last Night

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  (248): View more from Michigan

  Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.

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  (248): Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people. http://tfl.nu/2aml
  Replies (4) Good night (806) Bad night (1052)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring

  (989): View more from Michigan

  i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me

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  (231): my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring (989): i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me http://tfl.nu/18pl
  Replies (21) Good night (7043) Bad night (1169)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.

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  (740): well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong. http://tfl.nu/972k
  Replies (12) Good night (4659) Bad night (984)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!

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  (786): hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth! http://tfl.nu/9piv
  Replies (10) Good night (1273) Bad night (2118)
• Favorite

  (870): View more from Arkansas

  when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"

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  (870): when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned" http://tfl.nu/0h81
  Replies (5) Good night (1364) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night

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  (401): I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night http://tfl.nu/cz9o
  Replies (3) Good night (755) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself

  (760): View more from California

  Though I typed a half of that one

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  (760): Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself (760): Though I typed a half of that one http://tfl.nu/upbv
  Replies (7) Good night (870) Bad night (433)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.

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  (714): Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday. http://tfl.nu/bnh5
  Replies (1) Good night (1484) Bad night (394)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.

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  (651): Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz. http://tfl.nu/u6wd
  Replies (6) Good night (1445) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!

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  (907): I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st! http://tfl.nu/87p8
  Replies (2) Good night (734) Bad night (419)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.

  (562): View more from California

  I love my job.

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  (562): Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night. (562): I love my job. http://tfl.nu/bsab
  Replies (3) Good night (748) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...

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  (306): he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing... http://tfl.nu/oqmo
  Replies (2) Good night (318) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant

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  (609): Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant http://tfl.nu/a3fb
  Replies (5) Good night (366) Bad night (1023)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.

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  (414): You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities. http://tfl.nu/nk4h
  Replies (2) Good night (570) Bad night (178)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.

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  (864): Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap. http://tfl.nu/sxgt
  Replies (1) Good night (375) Bad night (141)

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