So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
