he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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