If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
Randomize
