So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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