Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
Randomize
