when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
