Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
She said her name was "party"
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize