I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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