i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Its guy fieris flavor town of sufferingâ„¢
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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