im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
