My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Randomize
