Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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