why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
Randomize