toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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