oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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