I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize