Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then