So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
There's always time for handjobs
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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