so explain again why im purple
no
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
