is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
