the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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