i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
