I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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