Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
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Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
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Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
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