May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
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