operation have a gay friend backfired
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Randomize
