wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.