Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
