Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
3pm strippers are depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
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