I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize