You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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