I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
