Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize