i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Randomize
