I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
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Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
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also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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