and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
Randomize
