WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
Randomize