After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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